U.R.Y

My last post was last month on the 18th, been so long since I've found time to write or even felt like blogging for that matter. Well, I've gone through hell the past few weeks and it seems like it's not gonna end..sleepless nights thinking about stuff that I shouldn't even think about cus it's just not gonna change things. Met a lot..I mean a lot of people that knew about something and I was shocked to know that the news had gotten that far. But anyway..some said just do it, some said the opposite. I say, can you guys shut up? I mean..yeah, it may look that way but really, it's not. Ranting aside..I'm quite happy with my common tests results, finally a distinction since the second half of sec 2. Praise God! The others were pretty well done too except biology and physics where I screwed up big time..too many careless mistakes and not memorizing hard enough. Mr. Cheng still said I made an improvement? Maybe a tiny but but I won't say I didn't. I freaking studied can?! After dropping A Maths, I felt like my whole shoulder became lighter..so much lighter that I could ace my E maths. Of course, it's not good enough for O levels though. Gonna work harder! Today's jam session was kinda of..how should I put it?? Not up there as compared to the previous session..my chords were everywhere but in the right place..drums went out of beat..I had no idea what bass was playing and i had nothing to say for the vocals..i can't bring myself to say it. Don't ask why!! You won't want to hear. Life back at home is quite enjoyable these days as compared to a year ago? Although it may kinda suck at times..but now I learn to treasure every moment like the dinner just now..although it was not worth $89..mum's starting SOT on monday and dad is doing more in GHN. Looking back, me and sis were the ones that brought them back to church and now, they have outdone me. Dad is getting known for all the help that he has done..what an honour it is for Pst. Derek and Pst. Aries to know you personally!! Dad got that!! Cool to have them to know you and keep you in prayer, it's one thing for you to know them, but it's a completely different thing for them to know you. For once, other than God, I thought you could be the one to keep me going, but I thought wrong. Guess it's about time God told me, will you trust Me? Not my will, but Yours be done. It's not my timing but it's His timing. Thoughts of a transfer out of the cell group are coming back..shit!! why?! I think I'm running away from all the shit that has happened within the cell group and I feel like this is no cell group anymore. Is it worth losing a friend over someone? Obviously no! Why can't this be in everyone's head?! Is it worth giving a damn when all you can do is have faith in God that things will turn around for the better? Is it worth all that energy trying to solve matters that are somehow impossible to? Is it worth all that time? But I know this for sure..if God wants to put me through this, it's for a reason, and through the storms, I'll emerge victorious. This weekend along with the next will be spent in JB..how great is that? Later on, going over for JB service and celebrate YQ's birthday but before that, I'm going to meet that pig for breakfast after so long. It's been ages since I said I wanted to meet up and both of us end school quite late. Then I'm gonna spend the weekdays working out..morning and night, I need discipline!!! Then on saturday night, going into JB again for a night as the next day's my aunt's wedding dinner. Gonna see what Pst. Kong and the staff saw when they were there. Excited!! But what to wear??? Hmm..cracking my brains for tomorrow already. Alrights..my thoughts for this post are like here and there..so bare with it. Heading to bed soon, meeting that pig at 9 tomorrow.